Sunday, May 23, 2010

Sometimes it's just the little things ~ Part 2

Sometimes it's just the little things in life... like my happy little sunflower. Last week I shared how it makes me smile. This week I'm thinking about the little things in life that stir up memories.

Little things we see, hear, taste, smell, etc can bring back a memory - good or bad. Even though I want my blog's focus to be about the positive things in life that bring Hope & Joy, I also want to keep it real. So ya know - life is just hard sometimes. And I find that the painful memories can overtake the joyful ones.

This month of May is one of the harder months of the year for me. Both Mother's Day and my Kyle's birthday fall in May. So I find myself with tears in my eyes or a lump in my throat a lot. Sometimes it seems that everywhere I turn there is a reminder of my son. It's just pretty much the normal every day type of little things that stir up these memories.

Like seeing a big black Ford F150.... that's what Kyle drove and was so proud of
or drinking an iced coffee... Kyle introduced me to flavored iced coffee (with extra cream & extra sugar of course)
or driving past Taco Bell.... his favorite was a double-decker taco with nacho cheese on it (at least twice a week)
or hearing a siren in the distance.... there were a lot of sirens the day Kyle died
or just any "little thing" and every "little thing"

Now, any of these little things can bring back a good and/or a bad memory. I am finding that most times I am able to focus on the good, but not always and it can be hard. It is a choice that I make each time. It's hardest when I can't link it to a good memory and I'm left remembering only the pain.

When that happens I go to my "bottom line" and remind myself that my Kyle is with Jesus and I will see him again. My "bottom bottom line" is he is now safe and happy. Because of his addictions to alcohol and drugs, he had pretty much lost all joy and hope. His choices brought him many regrets and much sadness. He wanted so much to change his life. We worried about him constantly. So, my knowing he is now safe and happy is maybe a little thing, but for a momma who soooo misses her son and loves him even more - it is a big thing. And a comforting thing.

So, friend - there is no denying life is hard and sometimes it's just the little things that bring the tears. But, I can still find hope & joy in life. I can... if I choose to. Sometimes it takes going to my "bottom line". It's my choice. After the pain and after the tears, it's the little choices of faith, hope, and prayer that makes the difference. Hey, that sounds like a good idea for a post for another day - "Sometimes it's just the little choices in life".

Wishing you happy "little things" in life,


  1. Debbie, I think I have found a new friend in you! What a lovely blog, and a beautiful post today. You write with such an honesty and sweetness that draws me in as I'm sure it does others, and will continue to do as others find you.Thank you for sharing your love for your son and your love for our Lord who sustains you. You are a brave heart!I know our Father finds such pride and delight in you as he keeps Kyle safe with Him. Keep writing and sharing! Blessings, Cate PS. Please come visit my new blog at

  2. Hi Cate,
    Thanks for stopping by... I am so glad you enjoyed your visit here. I appreciate your encouraging and kind words. Yes, I did stop by your lovely blog and enjoyed it very much. I also feel we are just beginning a new friendship here in blogland.
    Have a wonderful day,

  3. I have been taking a break--not on purpose--from blog land, and I do agree that it gives me an outlet for my creativity like nothing else does. It does, however, require boundaries or it is just another good thing crowding out the best thing. KWIM? I sometimes with I could be a full-time blogger, but then maybe not. :)

    Anyway, I am glad to be able to take some time to catch up with your blog. You amaze me with your determination to choose to find hope and joy in the little things . . . so many memories to sort through daily. It is a great reminder to all of us. Your faith is encouraging, Deb, so keep on writing!

  4. Denise,
    Thanks for taking some time to visit my blog. You are so right about being careful and having boundaries (mostly time wise) with my blogging.
    Thanks for your kind words to keep writing. Never thought of myself as a writer. I talk SO much better - so my blog is just sharing and conversational and hopefully it works.
    Have a great week!!
    Oh and please know I'm keeping your mom in my prayers.


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